Chatboard (11)

  • whisperitloudly

    I posted an entry for you.  "To New Beginnings".
  • beautyinbeautyout

    @whisperitloudly - Thanks! I'm never a herd follower--but it felt like everyone had changed their pictures all of a sudden! (ps: I'm not a great rider either, but I try, and I really want to be consistently "fearless" someday, esp over the fences! Maybe it's play mimicking life...ha.)
  • whisperitloudly

    I love your new profile pic!  I haven't been riding in probably 3 years, and I never did get very good at it.  Perhaps someday I'll take it up again.
  • beautyinbeautyout

    I wish E had not resurfaced. It's just causing me angst. He emails after being mia 4 over a month. In my return email,  I'm pretty clear I'd like to see him in person rather than just type type type. In his return email he ignores that & talks about what i put in my "post script" and leaves me hanging. Then, by not returning a followup email (its been three hours of sheer pain as I check and recheck my email like a fool). Wish he just stayed out of my life. It was better that way. I know this isn't the end of the story. I'm being tortured. I need to walk away.
  • beautyinbeautyout

    Maybe i'm not so dumb with men.. Maybe  holding out...keeping my heart vulnerable and open to E will pay off.   He emailed. I flushed. I emailed back. But just with enough to let him know I'd care.  I'll try to write back in a few days, I typed....but only after more than hinting that I still had feelings.....again I will povide updates.

  • beautyinbeautyout

    Txting makes it easy to be stupid. I just can't seem to let it go.  Having had way too many idealized thoughts about my lost relationship with E, I decided to shoot off a Txt while in traffic Friday afternoon. Having gotten no reply by Sat night, I shot off another. Can't I get the hint? Or do I need the self-torture of unrequited love/txt messages to reinforce how dumb I am with men? 
  • beautyinbeautyout

    If you don't want everyone to read it, should you really blog about it? Our Xanga sites are not locked diaries. Yet  we write very personal thoughts here. Should I remove every blog that I wouldn't want a new bf to read? Anything I wouldn't want my mother to know?  Husband?


    Nerevar_The_Incarnate's  blog, "She read about my exes and broke up with me," brought this question into clear focus.
  • beautyinbeautyout

    Sometimes. Make that all the time. When someone falls too fast for me. I get really nervous. I know it can't be real. I can't possibly live up to those expectations. 
  • beautyinbeautyout

    Who knows they're still too old to make out in a car, but still gets a thrill from it?
  • beautyinbeautyout
    After the Breakup: Do you Expect your "stuff" or Not?
     

    So? What do people do with the "stuff" that ex's either leave behind or have lent you during a relationship?


    I had awesome, passionate, worldwind relationship with a man I'll call T. We spent as much time in bed as we did imbibing, chitchatting, and nibbling. It was short, but intense and f-ing amazing. Then it ended.


    When I went back to his apartment to return the last book he lent me and  get a pair of pants I had left at his house, we wound up in bed and extending the doomed relationship another (awesome, passionate, sex-filled) month.  I saw it coming, and he broke up in txt.


    I have my pants, he has all the books he lent me, but, hey, T, where are my three books?   They're classics. I've got notes in them. I wa

  • beautyinbeautyout

    Hi all.  Life's feeling very confusing and complicated.   Divorce. Custody Case. Boyfriends that disappear. Internet Dates that bore.  Longing for love. Living in hate (with the soon-to-be-ex-amazingly-in-the-same-house) Ugh!!!! Anyone want to share horror stories or read my blog, which alternates between the fun stuff and the shockingly difficult divorce stuff?

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